5 Little Words

"I have issues, please pray"

These words were the beginning of something I would have never believed could happen in my life. But because of these words so much has occurred. In January 2008 I was at the end of my rope emotionally and physically. So one Sunday I decided to write these words on the communication card. I really didn't think much would come of it just that our minister would read it and pray and that's it. Well, God had other plans.

About a week or so after I had written this request I came home from work and had a voicemail message from church. It was a woman I knew of but didn't really know saying she received my prayer request and she had been praying for me. She said if I wanted to talk she would be more than willing to listen but since I didn't know her she would understand if I chose not too. After I listened to this my heart instantly stopped! I panicked! What if Eric already heard this message, what if he found out I even considered talking to someone. I was thinking, what have I done?! I quickly went onto the church website and emailed this person Roni and asked her to take my home number out of the database and only use my cell number to contact me. I told her that I didn't know if I would talk to her or not at choir since it was so crowded there and I don't want everyone to know what's going on with me She replied that the number had been changed and she didn't think talking at choir was a good idea either but the offer was still there should I want to talk at all. She would leave it up to me and she would be praying anyway.

It was the end of February or sometime in March when I emailed her again letting her know that I was feeling better and I believed it to be because of her prayers and the prayers from the Thatcher's. I asked her about her ABF (adult Sunday School) because I would like to visit her class and maybe get to know her a little better. She said it would be good to get to know one another. It was the beginning of April when we finally met for lunch for the first time at Panera.

I was so incredibly nervous about meeting with her and talking to her about what was going on with me. I didn't know if I could or not. All the what if's came into mind but I went anyway. As we sat there eating our lunch we had simple conversation about each other, and then I started talking. I was surprised by my willingness to tell her so many things about me. I described it all as my 'Jerry Springer life', telling her that I could keep him on the air without any re-runs for many years! She was easy to talk to and even though I felt my nerves trying to get the best of me, I kept talking. When we were finished she gave me a hug and told me she would keep praying and maybe we could get together again.

At the time, I could not see that God was right there at the table with Roni and I that afternoon in Panera. I really could not see God in my life very much at all during this time in my life. I was in church every Sunday. I was involved in choir and I was involved in Joy Quilters but I couldn't feel God in my life. I felt my life was completely falling apart and out of control. I really didn't know if he could hear my prayers or not because things certainly were not going the way I wanted them to go!

Shortly after our first meeting I was having a particularly bad day here at home. I called Roni at home even though I felt weird doing that! I mean after all she had 4 children and a husband she would be way to busy to bother at home with my problems! But she listened and she offered to meet me at her office to talk more. When I met her at her office I was telling her all about the problems here at home, how unhappy I was with the living situation and I had absolutely no idea what to do about it. Roni asked if I wanted to pray about it with her. I said yes, but I preferred she prayed.

Life changing event happened in that office!

When Roni prayed with me she held my hands and I heard the most heart felt prayer I had ever heard before. Not only that, but for the first time ever I felt like she and I were at the feet of Jesus while she prayed for me. He was in that room with us! From that point prayer was a totally different thing to me.

God was working so very hard in my heart.